God hates Gags?

by

in

Late on saturday I was joking about the futility of prayer for the nearly dead Pope. On Sunday morning, I didn’t get any Glastonbury tickets and on Monday night, my website broke for the first time in 4 years. Coincidence, or the petty retribution of a jealous and small minded God? Either way, I am not impressed.

I kept my bishop of rome bashing short and sweet. I was just light-heartedly wondering what more help he needed, pleading with his boss. I didn’t really launch into any criticism of the noted bigot. I didn’t lambast the man who was both misogynist and a homophobe. Or take him to task for all his pro-life but anti-AIDS prevention unpleasantness. Other were more forceful, if you want an effective reflection on that look on Justin’s blog. You should strike him down first, baby Jesus! (Admittedly, I agree with everything he says!)

Fear not, because my recent trials have not weakened my faith in the unexistence of God. (Interesting aside, did you know Kurt (Incompleteness) Gˆdel reworked the ontological argument? Don’t worry even the C20’s greatest logician couldn’t make it work!)

Missing out on Glastonbury was in part my own fault, I got up at 9am Sunday as required (after 3 hours sleep the two nights before) but didn’t get completely through. My ticket request seemed to be left somewhere ambiguous so I left things for a snooze.. a four hour snooze.. during which 120,000 tickets were sold from under my nose. You snooze, you miss out.

But when on Monday night, my ‘offending’ website broke for the first time in 4 years of hosting it at 1 & 1 I started to stop having my doubts. The database behind it mysteriously logjammed, either it was the Holy Ghost in the machine or perhaps Opus Dei were operating a denial of service attack on me.

It’s taken me until now to discover the Truth.. turns out this site has been more popular than I realised, I had 380,000 entries in the hits log table and 190,000 in the log for the Meaning of Life. Now once you remove the spambots, indexbots and the over-enthusiastic RSS-slurpers that probably translates to about 20 or 30 actual humans, it is still a big number. There’s more webtraffic in heaven and earth that I ever dreamt of.

May the Lord strike me down if it ain’t so.


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