when i worked as a computer programmer i always assumed that any inexplicable errors in my programs were due to ineptitude. this conclusion was a natural extrapolation from my experience that ALL explicable errors were due to ineptitude. a colleague of mine was more confident and a better programmer, if anything unusual went wrong with something he’d written, he’d spent a short time looking for a cause before dismissing it as the freak effect of a cosmic ray hitting the computer circuit or memory chip.

now a couple of months ago i got a new phone. it has an alarm, (incidently, the one feature that still works when the phone is turned off.) most mornings it wakes me up with a question. It starts beeping and buzzing and flashing and on the screen appears one little word..


the implied question is easy enough and the first four or five times it asks I normally agree to snooze.. but recently my sleep has been troubled. all of a sudden last week ‘snooze’ no longer looked like a real word. i became convinced it was spelt wrong. i still am, even though i know it is not.

it is worrying that my brain can cock up in this way and yet still be so self-righteous.. it refuses to believe me when i tell that snooze is spelt s-n-o-o-z-e, it cannot suggest an even half way plausible alternative:


and yet snooze still looks wrong, especially at 7:45 in the morning. maybe my head was hit by a high energy particle cascading from space or perhaps this is another reason for not sleeping with my mobile phone under my pillow?

if that’s how you spell ‘pillow’

About caspar

Caspar is just one monkey among billions. Battering his keyboard without expectations even of peanuts, let alone of aping the Immortal Bard. By day he is an infantologist at Birkbeck Babylab, by night he runs
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